Luck for Profitssss: A Teladi Story [DINQD]

[Baneblade]

Hello all, this here is my first "DINQD" story. What is DINQD? Dead Is Not Quite Dead.
Yes DID games are more exciting but despite putting in almost a combined total of 300+ hours in both TC and AP, I'm still somewhat of a X-universe newb .

Either way, here is the beginning of a new story, a story of the senseless quest for Profitsss and the death of all Paranid and Split. Enjoy!

RULES:

• * Dead Is Not Quite Dead: Applied Phlebotinum can be applied to save my own scaly Teladian bastu .
  * Being Teladi, I can only legally acquire Teladi, Boron, and Pirate/Yaki ships. Argon and Terran ships will need to be more skillfully acquired .
  * As per my personal taste, all Paranid and Split are a stain on the trouser hindquarters of the universe . They should all be killed.....eventually......
  * Scripts and mods installed at the start of game:
  Pirate Guild, Yaki Armada, Anarkis Defense Script, Board Stations, Station Re-packer, Marine Repairs, Marine Training Manager, Terran Marines, Terran MOB, LSDC, Cheat Scripts (see Applied Phlebotinum, above), and (if it ever works correctly ) Production Modules.

Above all else, enjoy! Let the Profitsss begin!

[Baneblade]

Chapter 0: Who again?

Awakening groggily to a harsh knocking on my apartment door is not a great way to start an evening.
Especially with a nice pounding hangover.
Wait, is someone actually at the door or is my head just making that harsh knocking sound?
Ergh....
I finally get around to opening the door and making myself look at least somewhat not hungover.....

A Teladian Company Security Officer standing on the other side asked "Are you Nopileos?"
Answering with a simple "...yes?" proved too much for my hungover brain to handle and only a quick hand to the temple stopped the organ from exploding out across the room.
"Then I have here rights for a ship from your friend, Hint"
Who was that again? I found myself asking "..Who again?"
"Hintorias Foologos Tissmaneos VII, owner of the Teladi Company Supply Albatross registration TTLMG-75..."
"Oh yea. Him."

Good ol' Hint. I had been working as a defense pilot for Hint's ship. That is until the company fired me for something along the lines of "Gross misconduct while On-Duty". But Hint still respected me as a friend.
"Well pilot, I guess you're getting a second chance from her. Mrs. Tissmaneos is transfering a second-hand Vulture trading ship damaged in a pirate attack to your control."
"Really? That's.....nice?"

"Remember one thing pilot." The Security officer snipped as he left. "For the love of Profitsss, at least TRY not to screw up this time."
"Will do.....Sir?" Was all the response I could muster.

Starting Assets:
1 Vulture, 71% hull
1 5mj shield
1 SETA
12,693 credits
~9tbs Phlebotinum
An insatiable lust for PROFITSSSS

[Baneblade]

Now our story begins in earnest!

Chapter 1: Ore=Profitsss

After waking from my short doze in the cockpit of my new ship, I took a quick mental appraisal of the situation.

Ship Hull: 71% = Not good
Ship Shields: A paltry 5mj = Also not good
Ship Weapons: Angry curses/gestures = Ineffective, pointless
Credits in Bank: 12,693 = TERRIBLE

Checking the stock at the local factories reveals a lack of ore in a Gauss Cannon Ammunition Factory and a surplus of ore at the Ore Mine L Alpha. Trading in ore proved to be a decent way to improve my capital as I soon was up to almost 30,000 credits.

Soon of course being a relative term. This Vulture is SLOW . Like not normal "Oh, it took a while for that to arrive" but full on "Who are you, and when did you request docking permission? Oh wait, my grandfather told me about you......"

Fixing the hull might help alleviate this serious case of glacial speed. Time to learn how to weld hull plating!

[Valkore]

Really funny so far. Like the fact there's no sudden ending now without DID. But I need more now, so get going, you have until there's morning here for me, as in 5 hours, and I need at least 3 more chapters.

Otherwise I heard the Paranid in Emperor mines pay really well for slaves...

Cheers

[Baneblade]

Valkore, sorry for the long time between posts, I can only really update on weekends
Also, most of this I'm currently writing is old material that I didn't record very well.

Soon this story will get better, I promise!

Chapter Two: Very Small Rocks!

Okay, hull is up to 100%. That means I can finally breathe safely. And my speed is now up to.....79.



Better than before, sorta.

A quick trip to the local equipment dock nets me a trading system extension, 2 more 5mj shields, and a single IRE. So now my ship is not quite as toothless and I don't have to worry about sneezing too hard in the cockpit. Now that I think about it, that odd whistling sound is gone from in here too......very strange.

Back to Profitsss. I decided to make the slow march through the north gate into Teladi Gain. Well, no ore trading here, but Sunrise Flowers can trade quite nicely. Maybe that's something I should invest in. Noticing that my cash is up to a fairly decent amount, I trek back down into Siezewell for more impulsive spending!

On a whim, I stop first in the stock exchange. A modest 10,000 credits (quite severe when you only have about 80,000) later, I can trade stocks in Teladi space. As my ship limps to the equipment dock, I decide to invest in biological microorganisms and high-tech goods. Not the wisest choice as bio microorganisms immediately shoots downward.



Bound to happen anyways.

After a brief argument with the dock personel, my Vulture was outfitted with both a mineral scanner and ore collector. Soon my ore will be entirely self purchased which translates into max Profitsss .

Teladi market won't know what hit them........

[Nathancros]

g'day

good humour and a great read i think u got a reader here

[Baneblade]

g'day

good humor and a great read i think u got a reader here

Thanks for your support, my humor is actually somewhat inspired by Nuclear Slug's DID games. Which are a great read for anyone interested.

Chapter Three: Even Smaller Rocks!

Mining has got to be the most boring activity ever. Especially in a Vulture. Soon I might be able to finish my current selection of novels on the ship's computer.

And this ship has full internet access through my trading system extension. Yea, its that bad .

After all this ramming small rocks business was over, I docked at the station with the best prices for ore. My bank account swelled up to almost 100,000! Much Profitsss indeed .

More exploring is therefore in order. Maybe there's some stations with good Profitsss to be made in Greater Profit. I mean, come on, Profitsss are practically in the sector name.


...

I'll get my coat.
And a load of ore to sell to the quantum tube fabs in Greater Profit oddly empty of ore......

[Baneblade]

Chapter Four: Why Hello Old Friend

Being a generally lazy being, I opted to purchase ore at rock-bottom ( ) prices from the L ore mine in Seizewell. Selling ore to the Quantum Tube Fabs brought my funds up to around 300,000. Traveling back into Seizewell, I spotted a patch of silicon rocks near the shipyard.

A quick scan of the local Satellite Factory revealed they were desperate for silicon.



A long mining trip later and my funds had swelled up to almost half a million credits! Time to blow it all on a station, i guess. After scanning the local markets, sunrise flowers are definitely in high demand and fantastically short supply. Greater Profit seems a good place as any to set up.

Ever the entrepreneur, good ol' Hint seemed very willing to transport my station. I say seemed as he spent a few minutes just sitting stationary at the edge of the sector.

"Um, Hint? You gonna' transport my station sometime this year?"

With traces of annoyance in his voice, Hint responded with "I would sure like tah, but they don' make escort pilots like they used tah."

I heard a distant shout about someone's bastu and a nice charbroiling.

I sure Hint will have it sorted out sometime soon. Meanwhile, I'm off to scout out exactly where to put the darn thing....

[Nathancros]

nice

i'ma throw a bit of advice*probably more personal opinion but hey it will do XD*.

try and make bigger chapters.. if u havent got much. then save it and add more to it when u play again..

i personally prefer 1 big chapter a week then 7 tiny ones

just personal opinion

took me 3 reads to get that first joke btw
oi i was tired quit laughin at me like that XD

[Baneblade]

nice
...
i personally prefer 1 big chapter a week then 7 tiny ones

just personal opinion

took me 3 reads to get that first joke btw
oi i was tired quit laughin at me like that XD

Subtle humor is somewhat of an area I'm currently working on. Thanks for your support and this chapter will be larger, I promise!

Chapter Five: Phlebotinum, Applied

While Hint was no doubt dispensing some indiscriminate justice, I decided to set out to find solar power plants for my own no doubt later nefarious purposes. Blue Profit had a few, but these were M-sized and prone to running out. What I really needed was an XL plant.....

Yes, I know, I only have to supply a single M fab (well, eventually I will), but it never hurts to future-proof. One arduously long trek through Spaceweed Drift nets....one of the two XL SPPs still intact. Not bad, I guess. Also on the good side, Hint finally 'commed me to say he'd arrived in Greater Profit. Very good.....

You are now reading the story of one very happy Teladi. A station is the first step towards universal economic domination!

Once it actually starts making money that is.....

Delivering my load of E-cells jump-started production, but my operation is still limited to my personal Vulture. Hmmmm.......

A flip-through of Teladi ship catalogs on my way to one of the SPPs in Blue Profit yields a possible winner for my personal ship: Falcon Hauler. Not only is it a capable fighter, it has XL cargo capacity. I smell Profitsss!

Either that or the stench of something burned on this station. Man, it reeks! I mean, we're talking worse than a BORON SPP!

Soon I found the source of the stench as a obviously shady gentleteladi approached me as I waited for my E-cells to be loaded. He was selling Space Weed, not the best profession of choice, but to each his own Profitsss, right?

Still, my cargo is taking a while and I'm still riding down the giddy high of buying a station, so whats the worst that could happen?

[Baneblade]

Whats the worst that could happen?

Worst mistake of my life thus far.

Chapter Six: Phlebotinum, Applied Part Deux

I'm soooo screwed. Pirates? Yep. That happened.

Shields? Only 10mj. Plus an IRE and any witty comments about said pirates' parents spitted over comms in my last moments.

I need more shields. These Pirates won't give up. Wait, is that an Ad Sign?



......

This shield doesn't work well, but it stops lasers, I guess. Senior Captain Higges-worth is recommending a full battle retreat, but the rest of the Boron War Council have cast their fish in favor of President Nixon. Odd, considering that entrance polls put him ahead of Sir Mutton-Chops Lincoln.....

.......

Waking with a sudden start was bad enough. Realizing that you can't account for or remember the events of the past few hours is worse. The inevetable headache is the real clencher.

ERkkgghshg.......


Well, the good news is that I delivered my load of E-cells and....bought...a....lasertower? Okay, this needs some mental explanation.

The jarring alarms of inbound threats coupled with Betty cheerfully stating, "Warning. Hostiles inbound." really did it for me. Turns out I didn't imagine those pirates after all........

[Nathancros]

rofls XD good one

[Apothecarian]

I have a question for you, what happens when you run out of plebtonium? Will the DIQNDness wear off?

But seriously, cant wait for the part of the story after the Man Pance are put on.

[Baneblade]

Chapter Seven: Used Car Salesman

Okay, I think this lasertower should work. Just a kick out of the airlock, a few taps on the keyboard later....and.....

[ external image ]

Not too bad a result if I don't say my self. Time to take a break from working at the station and possibly finding some juicy ore to sell.

But not literally, because that would be somewhat disconcerting.


Anyway, a hop, a skip, and a broken-legged crawl later any I'm trawling the comm lines at the Siezewell shipyard to scout potential deals. Selling used ships can be a quite lucrative business. Well, turns out I'm in special luck today......

A slightly used (75% hull) Toucan showed up as today's Dish of the Day. The asking price?

40,000 credits.



Time for some more hull welding!

[Baneblade]

Chapter Eight: Now Accepting Applications

Finally having two ships means I can finally set up my Vulture as a CAG and never have to worry too much about my factory for a while. I just need more equipment; splitting 2 5mj shields and a single IRE among two ships is never easy. Maybe some exploring will reveal new EQ docks with better stock.....

Ceo's Sprite does seem to have it all. I mean, when you have a Military Base, Marine Training Barracks, Teladi Super-shipyard, and fabs for literally every type of shield, what more can you really ask for? Well getting these 2 25mj shields for free would be nice but.....

Okay, after a noticeably faster trip back up to Siezewell, both of my transporters are outfitted with shields and IREs. Some quick bashes of my head against the keyboard ( uh I mean programming) and my CAG is all ready to go. Now let's see how much money he can waste before he meets an untimely death......

And no, those specific pirates that attacked my station won't be back. However, there will always be others.....

[Baneblade]

No this story still continues, but just a little delayed right now. I'm getting to the exciting action parts soon, I promise!

Chapter Nine: Getting an Upgrade

This Toucan is very nice, especially for the increased speed. Plus, taking taxi missions is a nice way to raise money for my current goal: buying a Falcon Hauler. Hauling snobish Teladi aristocrats around for about 100k credits and harsh criticisms of the decor of my ship really gets on my nerves after a few trips. Time to set course for ADVENTURE!

Well at least in theory. Maybe I can find a second-hand ship, maybe a fighter! I mean, I don't have to fly it, so the interior could be caked with dried blood and smell like rancid Bo-Fu (somehow that smells worse than regular Bo-Fu). That's the pilot's problem.

Trolling the comm nets again bears some fruit: A slightly used Buzzard Vanguard. Overall not a great fighter, but still cheaper than usual. My factory does need some defense after all....

Bought. Lets see what else is here....

Toucan Hauler, 68% hull. A quick background check reveals that civilians can not normally buy the Toucan Hauler. I mean, it is better in every aspect over the regular Toucan. Time for a trade-in, I guess......

[Triaxx2]

I've taken over the DiD list from Dragon Dream, and you've been added. Congratulations!

Hey, which game are you playing?

[Baneblade]

I've taken over the DiD list from Dragon Dream, and you've been added. Congratulations!

Hey, which game are you playing?

Thanks for the notice and I'm playing Albion Prelude

[Triaxx2]

Sweeet, I'll move it then.

[Baneblade]

Sweeet, I'll move it then.

Thanks very much for the notice! Sorry for the lack of updates, but I just have a lot going on right now. I'll try to update more often.....

Promise!

Chapter Ten: Shady Business Deal

This Toucan Hauler is even nicer than the regular Toucan: faster, larger cargo bays, and a better selection of games in the lounge. Now off to find some shields and weapons for my Buzzard. Off to Ceo's Sprite!

Along the way, I check out the progress of my Vulture CAG. Seems he's managed to create a massive surplus of Sunrise Flowers and currently is too busy wasting money on...erm...buying more E-cells without selling any product. On the plus side, I don't have to pay him a salary yet, but....

Looks like I'll be trading some Sunrise Flowers. *sigh* I thought this was why I hired a minion anyway. Well, people are stupid, I guess.

After depleting about half of my station's stock, I decided in a fit of pique to head back up to Siezewell to troll the nets again.....

What I caught was certainly surprising.....

An Osprey. Seems legit so far....however, the price.....

2.5mil.



My cash flow could nowhere buy that ship right now. However, a quick check of the shipyard reveals their asking price is 15mil for a new Osprey.

So what's up with this one? Is it haunted by the ghosts of the dead crew-members? Was it owned by a notorious pirate gang still hated today? Had it been impossible to scrape the blood of the the stupid lemming off the inside of the nav console? Did it have the red ring of death?

A better question is: Did I care?