Boron's - The Early Years Pt 2 of ? (till I get bored)

[scritty]

Mallard weighed up his options. He remembered films where people were put into wierd situations and FREAKED.... It never worked.

I mean did Bud Abbot ever Believe Lou Costello when he started drumming his bottom lip and going
"Wuh --duh --ahhh oohh err " - No he bloody well didn't.

Also, was Bud Abbot the fat gibbering idiot or the one covered with Brylcream ..he couldn't remember that either.

In fact wasn't Bud Abbot one of the "Mad Abbots" or a "Grumbleweed" or something.

Notwiththosetitsyoudont was staring at him intently. ****..he had been thinking out loud ..AGAIN!

You all right dear he (sorry..we'll have a he again) asked.

"Yeah sure ..... mum ?"

No reaction from his cross dressing hermaphrodite body swap brother mother ...good.

""Errm is it time for breakfast yet"

"Well it was ..... 5 YEARS AGO"


Dum Dum DUUUUUUUUUUUUM !!!!!

"Why did you say that mother ?" Mallard asked

"Dunno" Notwiththosetitsyoudont replied "Thought it might be funny..actually it's nearly half past eight..they are testing the new rocket again tonight"



Dum Dum DUUUUUUUUUUUUM !!!!!

"Again ?" Mallard questioned

"No..sorry, i mean for the first time" Notwiththosetityoudont turned and left the room..Mallard was not so sure. Something about that last conversation just wasn't right. (besides the grammar and sentence construction that is...ooh and the spelling)

Mallard wondered..but not for long ...

In truth, he couldn't remember whether his real mother had actually hired Bernard Breslaw and Jack Douglas as handyman and chauffeur, or whether it was just another maifestation of the general "basting" that he was getting at the moment.

When he alighted into the lounge for breakfast..it was indeed Jack Douglas that waited on him with his morning coffee. Predictably (sadly) Mr Douglas, when JUST about to hand over the scalding drink suddenly acted as if someone had tapped him on the shoulder.

"Oooerrr..eh...eh..whatsat" he said (OBVIOUSLY)

and (OBVIOUSLY) he threw most of the coffee over poor Mallard, before looking down into the empty cup..scratching his head.. and saying (OBVIOUSLY)

"I could swear this cup was full when I came in"

From the kitchen Mallard could hear the deep but distinctively dull tone of Bernard Breslaw telling someone called "Sid" that he'd "be out with it in a minute"

Mallard decided to forgo breakfast..even his morning tete a tete with Natasha Kaplinski would have to wait (she was SUCH a good listener...with the volume on mute that is, and with some gaffa tape over the other side of the screen covering her co-host's face).

He grabbed his coat (well he assumed it was his coat..he'd never seen it before) and left.

He was off to the rocket lab's..On the way he wondered how Peter Blake films had ever made their way onto Boron space...and why no-one on any Boron prime planet had ever heard of Kajagoogoo..because he certainly had.

------------------------------------------------

More blatherings from the witless wonder writer next time.

Where has Notwiththosetitsyoudont gone ?

Who is the mysterious Sid and what does he want ?

Who really wears stoat skin coats ?

What is going on at the Boron rocket plant ?

What's happened to Toppocketpen..why have i spelt his name differently now ?

All may be revealed if this thread isn't locked for obvious reasons ...


Clarker

[RustiSwordz]

Somebody fetch me the double lobotomy kit and 10 rolls of rubber wallpaper.

Scritty has flipped.......

Funny, mental as a barrel of dranged monkeys but funny.

[Betrayal]

No reaction from his cross dressing hermaphrodite body swap brother mother ...good

LOL

Man, its way to early to be reading this. I think somebodys had to many disco biscuits.

---------------------------------------------
Biscuits we all love them don't we. But what exactly is a biscuit

Biscuit comes from the french meaning twice-cooked but don't let that put you off, as the french don't really have a clue about making decent biscuits. Those dreadful Petit Beurre things that they knock out are really nasty. They sound like they are going to be really nice, like some sort of little buttery thing, but they're not. I've seen some where they put a big slab of chocolate on the top in an attempt to make them nice but it was all a bit wrong!