Happy Landings a - short - story.

[Paranoid66]

- Happy Landings -

A genuinely - short - story that escaped from the ‘X’ inspired but even more futuristic and at times crazier ‘Beyond ‘X’ Universe’.


He gave me that look again. Was he fighting with the mundane too? “Alright,” he said, “where do you see yourself in five years time?” he asked.

I am sure looking back I tried not to smile but possibly failed. I had expected this silly question to be thrown in somewhere and was armed like a ‘Tank Class Conglomerate Marine’ not with big guns (I would not know what to do with them) but with the perfect retort. “Dead,” I said then worrying that I had leapt in just a fraction of a millisecond too soon with the ideal answer I felt obliged to elaborate. Unnecessary elaboration being something I tend to do when I get nervous even when lecturing.

“In that void place that is the only real escape from the truer morbidity of consciousness.” I told him, take that Professor, I thought.

I got another one of those measuring looks. Under that steady gaze my station suit began to itch - I also sweat a lot when I get nervous - it was not my fault - none of this was - some fool had seriously messed up when they coded the less important aspects of my genetics I had often considered recoding myself for the greater good.

“You do know this is merely a formality,” the ‘Hierophant’ said blithely attempting to crush the last of my hopes.

It was quite possible that I groaned aloud. Was it true after all that they doctored the official recordings if so why were they going through the process of this sham? In desperation I stood up moved my chair a little to the left, sat down, looked around, got up again, moved my chair even further to the right of its original position walked around it three times then sat down again as if nothing had happened. It was hopeless they would seamlessly edit that out as well. Then being a genius, I had an inspiration. After the interview, I would go to an ‘Interdiction Fleet Security Clinic’. I would claim I had odd urges or disjointed recollections. I would force them to check me over as a possible victim of a ‘Mind Crime’ they would extract the real interview from my memory and my unsuitability for the posting would be exposed my licence revoked.

“You really have got yourself worked up to the point where you are no longer thinking entirely rationally. If ‘IF’ scans your mind they will know all your actions are a scheme to avoid your duty they will just fine you for wasting their time,” the ‘Hierophant’ stated.

I felt like a complete fool for he was obviously right in his assumption, however, in a way that very irrationality that ridiculous oversight should also disqualify me from service as, as, I baulked just a little, an unstable and unreliable individual. Then with a start I questioned how did he know what I was planning? How could he know? Then the irony of it all became clear. I had signed a waver so that I could occasionally test my own experimental equipment on myself but technically due to the requirements of assistants and all that it also allowed others on my project to do the same - one of my students was betraying me possibly to steal the credit for my work it was a conspiracy. They were using the prototype of my own ‘Surface Thought Mind Analyser Project’ - the fiends.

“Listen Professor we voted on this - you know that. Everybody has to do it; it is only fair otherwise, you know what will happen we will have to dumb some members of our future populace down. Is that what you want to see imbecilic ‘Hierophants’ rolling out, possibly polluting the gene pool if they breed and manual labourers do so like to breed they breed like the simple minded animals they are? We could end up with criminal louts like the ‘Omerta’ as the majority of our citizens in just a few generations. Do you want to see that come to pass just to keep you happy in your work all of the time?” He asked.

“Not everyone will ever take a turn - it is random - a simple lottery and like all truly random systems it lacks logic and by its very nature is an anathema to the ordered mind. This is a criminal waste of my especially gifted abilities. I will not survive, I will moulder, die a little every day wilt like a flower cut at its prime and taken out of the sun. This is a mistake you must see that. The ‘Core Alliance Civil Space Oversight Authority’ won‘t even let you use the ‘Inter Link’ to advance personal projects during scheduled working hours,” I pleaded having naturally done my research.

The ‘Hierophant’ stood up his back rigid. “Congratulations,” he said, “on attaining your ‘Jump Master’s’ licence.”

I felt faint my Universe was collapsing all around me. Like an invasive parasite, the pilot permit data that would allow me to oversee the huge transports that leapt only from port to port settled into my neural net along with the schedule of my first departure time. The net closed, the vault door slammed, the trap caught me in its metal teeth.

“This is unconscionable you and I both know those ships are fully automatic they have minds of their own,” I bitterly complained.

“A pilot is a legal requirement and for security reasons our Father will not allow our logistical transports to be flown by other species,” the Interviewer said.

“I will appeal this decision I will not go quietly out into that night,” I promised.

“There will be no appeal if you make any more trouble we will find a way to extend the three month period of your tenure, happy landings,” the ‘Hierophant’ said.

“Three months I will kill myself,” I said as they escorted me out.

“Next please,” called out the voice of my erstwhile tormentor. An eminent ‘Hierophant’ Professor of literature shuffled reluctantly past me his eyes downcast. I patted him on the back, “just three months,” I told him trying to be brave for the sake of the doomed fellow.



A note by P66.

On a whim I decided not to use my usual ‘Beyond ‘X’’ format as this one was not told from the perspective of the ‘Many Truth’s Living Hull’ thus no square brackets. Amusingly though as I was typing I kept putting them in out of habit and had to go back afterwards and take them out again - worrying.