X2: The Spoof

Epiphany · Post by **Epiphany** » Thu, 3. Jun 04, 06:45

I LOVE THIS

GunFreak · Post by **GunFreak** » Thu, 3. Jun 04, 06:58

Nyax wrote: Damn Banna: No it's VITAL that we secure it.
Julain: Why?
Damn Banna: Because it's vital.

I love the Catch-22 bits of this creative work of genius. I can't wait for the next installment.

Sagan · Post by **Sagan** » Thu, 3. Jun 04, 20:46

better and better and ROFLMAO!!

Sir Crashalot · Post by **Sir Crashalot** » Thu, 3. Jun 04, 21:20

LMAO

Excellent stuff !

So true too.

Howlingmad · Post by **Howlingmad** » Fri, 4. Jun 04, 16:41

Keep it coming Nyax!!

It's even better than the real plotline.

Hey Egosoft, maybe in the next update or the addon, you could make X2 into a comedy.

Battle Pope · Post by **Battle Pope** » Fri, 4. Jun 04, 18:24

This has GOT to be one of the funniest literary works I've seen in a LONG time!

About time someone made a mockery of this mockery of a storyline!

RustiSwordz · Post by **RustiSwordz** » Fri, 4. Jun 04, 20:59

Howlingmad wrote:

Keep it coming Nyax!!

It's even better than the real plotline.

Hey Egosoft, maybe in the next update or the addon, you could make X2 into a comedy.

u just given me an idea.....

as for the story. Bloody funny.

rhanse0 · Post by **rhanse0** » Tue, 8. Jun 04, 00:49

This is great, I wait with baited breath for the next part.
(baited breath is what you use to get a boron to talk to you or when your fishing for compliments.)

zin242 · Post by **zin242** » Tue, 8. Jun 04, 03:53

I just can't get enough . My daughter has never played X2, but she is roflaf at this on top of me

CopperToad · Post by **CopperToad** » Mon, 28. Jun 04, 19:42

Great story but its not finnished is it??? wheres the next instalment?

Argonaught. · Post by **Argonaught.** » Mon, 28. Jun 04, 21:23

CopperToad wrote:Great story but its not finnished is it??? wheres the next instalment?

I second that....excellent....need more.

johneh77 · Post by **johneh77** » Thu, 1. Jul 04, 01:56

I havent belly laughed that hard so many times in months or even years!
I laughed so hard I'm tired!
I would love to hear the rest of it!

Nyax · Post by **Nyax** » Sat, 3. Jul 04, 01:02

Sorry for the lack of recent postings. Work has been sending me to Belgium almost every week of late so my freetime and access to my PC have been severly curtailed.

Never fear though, The Spoof will return...

Ray Driver · Post by **Ray Driver** » Fri, 9. Jul 04, 01:45

Nyax

Brilliant..... ROFLMAO big time!!!

You HAVE to keep going with this!

Many thanks for the entertainment, and hoping to see more soon.

Lee

SevenKiller · Post by **SevenKiller** » Fri, 9. Jul 04, 08:02

more more more!!

great stuff keep it coming

Captain_Elson · Post by **Captain_Elson** » Sun, 11. Jul 04, 07:08

(Shoots Ban, Mi-ton, Every Paranid and boron..and that %$^%^@#^ annoying female pirate I can't kill enough times) Good Story Now all we need is the Windows infected Xenon and the Symmecial Kharrk.

Nyax · Post by **Nyax** » Sun, 11. Jul 04, 12:29

Now all we need is the Windows infected Xenon

Nuts! you've been reading ahead...

esd · Post by **esd** » Sun, 11. Jul 04, 17:53

I reckon, with this thread's growing length, that it'll get harder to find your excellent tales within the appreciation of it - maybe you should copy all the parts of the story into your first post? Make it a whole lot easier to read

And hurry up with the next bit already! *cracks whip*

Priest Emperor · Post by **Priest Emperor** » Wed, 21. Jul 04, 07:56

Well im tired of waiting... so...

:Note: this work will be inferior to the origional posters quality

Part 5... Julian decides to follow Saya.

Saya: oh julian im ever so glad you decided to go with me on the Summer Rose route.
Julian: well i figure the sooner i get this mission over with the sooner i wont have to see you.
Saya: Ooh your so sweet julian. dont hesitate to equip your ship or trade along the way!
Julian: oh i wont... hey this is Lucky Planets isnt it?
Saya: yes... why do you ask?
Julian: well i was told this is a good place to build a Solar Power Plant!
Saya: but we have to get to Nyanas Hideout.
Julian: why? its just another scripted event.
Saya: Oh your soo smart Julian.

*orders and places the SPP*

Julian: alright based on my calculations of the horrible state of the economy, by the time we get back from this mission i will have over 10 billion bucks. lets get a move on.

*approaching East Gate in Eleventy Billion*

Saya: careful julian, thats almost certain death in there! make sure you keep up your speed!
Julian: why, the Ks can go faster than both of us anyways.
Saya: yeah but im part of this plot, i cant be killed.
Julian: of course...

*entering Scale Plate Green*

Saya: well that was the funnest thing ive ever done, dont you agree my love?
Julian: for the last time, i am not your girlfriend!
Saya: thats not what mom said.
Julian: Who cares we need to finish this horribly plotted mission!

Bent: Ohhhhh.. dudess!! your finally here! And my favorrrite standard uniformm tooo.
Saya: having fun with the space weed bent?
Bent: oh yeah, got my hands on some Argon Wiskey... it took you guys ages.
Saya: well Julian had to spend a month setting up a SPP.
Julian: for the last time this is all scripted it doesnt matter!
Saya: Im going to go to HQ because appearently i cant contact them by mail like Ban Danna can with you.
Julian: thank god.
Bent: well now that im magically cured from my drunkeness lets get that Teladi...
Teladi: Hissss sssstupid argon... nothing here.... hissss
Bent: then why am i getting a reading from the I AM GLUMMER?
Teladi: hisss you hasss faulty equipment! hisss
Bent: move over pal the ship is ours.
Teladi: Hiss ship minessss
Bent: Oh no the Krack have arrived! looks like were going to have to help that teladi in fighting them!
Teladi: Hisss even i am not sssstupid enough to fight... hissss... i runsss to my ssship nowsss
Bent: c'mon jules lets go fight those Krack!
Julian: uhh how is it that your now magically 40km away from me?
Bent: and you said i was on space weed....
Julian: ah nevermind lets kill these.

*defeats the Krack*

Bent: damn! that teladi has stolen the I AM GLUMMER. Those shields are too strong jules, im going to go in there the old fashion way and steal that ship! cover me.
Julian: how come i cant fly?
Bent: because this is a poorly plotted story.

*bla bla bla gets the ship blabla Saya comes back*

Saya: Hey Julian honey! i talked to my mom and shes sending in a Mammoth as soon as possible!
Julian: why doesnt Argon One come to get it?
Saya: because we need the most vulnerable transport possible to carry it!
Julian: of course...
Saya: Oh no im getting a large Krack signature! Julian i cant call off the transport now!
Julian: why it only takes 10 seconds to get back to Home of Light and tell them whats going on
Saya: No. No i cant do that! we have to fight!

Saya: good job julian we defeated the cluster!
Elena: Hello julian! so nice to see you! im sorry i couldnt make it back there at HQ
Julian: no its alright, it was enough Hell just to have Saya there.
Saya: isnt he sweet mom?
Elena: oh yes i adore him.
Bent: Uhh hate to ruin your reunion but our teladi friend is back! but dont worry, i crashed the I AM GLUMMER back into that asteroid it was on and am now im my Nova.
Teladi: Hisss... All yoursss bassessss are belongsss to usssss
Saya: Julian we have to fight off the Teladi and his friends!
Teladi: Hisss... youss cannotss beats the aewsomess power of our Buzzardsss.
Elena: were under attack! so i will of course, not move my ship and keep it in the middle of harm.
Julian: great idea

*1 minute later*

Julian: well that was easy.
Elena: alright, back on course.
Saya: Oh no another Cluster!
Elena: all right stopping engines

Elena: all right, good job guys, we have secured the I AM GLUMMER. Oh and Julian, i have a special suprise for you, my future son-in-law.

:END:

P.S. sorry for all those who read this garbage i have written =)

egosoft.com

egosoft.com

X2: The Spoof