What constitutes success?

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fiksal
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by fiksal » Wed, 17. Mar 21, 22:36

greypanther wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 20:44
On a personal level that is. From talking to people out here in the real world, it normally seems to revolve around money and property, sort of a way of keeping score. This seems to be a very shallow measure to my mind, family; children; societal contribution and education/intelligence are far better measures. :)

What do you guys think then? How many of you think you are successful and why? ( I cannot say how hard it was to resist a poll herein... :roll: )
I think the best way to go about is to make one up for yourself. This way you know the parameters and you hopefully know how to approach it. You are not dependent on others.

Money is indeed a default level of success that a lot of people use. While it can be for some, it also can be contradictory to all the other goals.

EDIT: realizing I didnt answer anything...

To me success is supporting ones family and self realization. Very generic perhaps.

I think I am moderately successful, yet there's always room for improvement.
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mrbadger
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by mrbadger » Fri, 26. Mar 21, 14:39

Success can be lots of things, not just one, even for a single person.

Having some students enjoy my modules is a success.
Writing, or rather re-writing a decent part of whatever book I'm writing is a success.
But also walking ten feet using only my crutch without having to lean on anything for support is a success, even if it always hurts.

It's an ever moving target. I'd hate to be a situation where success had only one meaning, like wealth, or fame.
If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared. ... Niccolò Machiavelli

Mightysword
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Mightysword » Wed, 31. Mar 21, 23:04

As I grow older I start to think a little bit differently. Many years ago I said something like this on this forum "my goal is to work like a dog in the first half of my life in order to live like a king in the latter half". Now ... I kinda struggle to quantify both phrase of that statement. The first decade and a half I was at the US I definitely felt I worked like a dog, I don't think I have been working like a dog in the last few years. But I also have trouble imagining what living like a king look like, because my standard for luxury is kinda low I think. :gruebel:

In the last couple years I started questioning the idea behind "having a goal" at all. A student with a goal of "just passing the class" may not put in a lot of effort and achieve a result lower than he should get. A student with a goal of "passing the class with an A" may create unnecessary pressure on himself, which in turn may compromise the result. I have been thinking ... maybe just focus on the short term afford and ... take whatever result that lead you to? So in this example, the student's only goal would be "I gonna do my best everyday". If your best is enough to get an A, great! If you best is only enough for you to pass, be content with that too. At the end the question isn't about "did you get an A" or "did you pass", but "have you done your best". In my experience, usually when I end up at a result I don't want, 9/10 times upon reflection it's really about me not doing my best.

I have tried to apply this line of thinking into a few things I do lately, and so far, I like it. I had tried to study Japanese a few times, each time with a goal I set to myself, and each time I faltered. This time, I decided not to set any goal at all. Things like "go through this volume in 3 months, knowing this many vocabulary, able to read this many kanji ...etc..." had all ended up overwhelmed and discouraged me in the past. Now, my only focus is the day to day discipline: 1.5h - > 2h a day, everyday. Where will that amount of afford take me ... will it be a success or failure, no clue because I'm not even bothering about defining such a thing this time. But what I can tell is I'm more happy about the progress I'm making now comparing to the time where I actually tried to work toward a specific milestone.
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clakclak
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by clakclak » Thu, 1. Apr 21, 19:02

Mightysword wrote:
Wed, 31. Mar 21, 23:04
[A lot of interesting things, especially about a changing perspective.]
I do not know why, but somehow this comment spoke to me more than any other comment that was made before. Even though it is very different from my personal outlook on life. Thanks for sharing Mightysword. I appreciate your self reflection.
"The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn't have the weight of gender expectations." - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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