What constitutes success?

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greypanther
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What constitutes success?

Post by greypanther » Sat, 13. Mar 21, 20:44

On a personal level that is. From talking to people out here in the real world, it normally seems to revolve around money and property, sort of a way of keeping score. This seems to be a very shallow measure to my mind, family; children; societal contribution and education/intelligence are far better measures. :)

What do you guys think then? How many of you think you are successful and why? ( I cannot say how hard it was to resist a poll herein... :roll: )
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Alan Phipps » Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:06

Success is when you usually get up in the morning with a sense of anticipation and pleasure rather than a sense of resentment or worry. Yes, all those things you mentioned in the OP, along with other personal reasons and motivations, count towards that.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Teladi CEO » Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:16

Success is both achieving the personal goals and non personal goals that you aim for in life. I think success is being wealthy and having a good job, for people that aim for that. However for others it may be being happy or going to space or some other action.

I haven’t achieved my success yet, but I am on my way. My goals are very high, and I have done measures to reach them. I run a charity ($20,000 for Breast cancer patients! Can’t wait to start it back up when COVID settles) I’ve protested what I’ve thought was unjust and have tried to improve the world by making someone smile or feel good.

So I’m not there yet, but I am pretty close.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Observe » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 01:06

There have been times in my life when I had a yardstick for success, but now that I am old, I see the folly in many of my erstwhile goals. Certainly, there is the success of providing a roof over ones head and food on the table. Those are fundamental.

It is when our views of success are manufactured by the dubious interests of our own or society's expectations, that we waste our precious time in constructing a prison of conformity that breeds mediocrity and dulls the mind.

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Mightysword » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 03:06

For me success = happiness. I don't want to have something or achieve something for the shake of saying I did it. Stuffs like pride, prestige and the like don't really register with me.

If I can live happily with as little worry as possible, I'll call that a success. :)
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by clakclak » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 08:16

greypanther wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 20:44
[...]( I cannot say how hard it was to resist a poll herein... :roll: )
I am proud that you fought against your darker desires and triumphed. Was that success for you?



As for myself, I usually determine success by small things. Tomorrow I have a date and it will have been a success if both she and I had a fun evening. If that isn't the case it isn't really a failure though. Just if things go bad. If they go bad enough that she throws the wine bottle at me, I guess that is also a success in some weird way because then it was a memorable evening if nothing else.
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mr.WHO
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by mr.WHO » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 08:28

Alan Phipps wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:06
Success is when you usually get up in the morning with a sense of anticipation and pleasure rather than a sense of resentment or worry.
Damn, I like this definition!

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Olterin » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 08:59

Alan Phipps wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:06
Success is when you usually get up in the morning with a sense of anticipation and pleasure rather than a sense of resentment or worry. Yes, all those things you mentioned in the OP, along with other personal reasons and motivations, count towards that.
I do believe we have the best answer right here already. All other measures may be subjective, but this one should be pretty universal, no matter what aspirations you have.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by BrasatoAlBarolo » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 10:03

I agree with Alan "cuddly teddy bear" Phipps. Completely.

If there was a poll, success would have probably been "sausages".

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Mailo » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 10:51

Teladi CEO wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:16
I haven’t achieved my success yet, but I am on my way. My goals are very high, and I have done measures to reach them. I run a charity ($20,000 for Breast cancer patients! Can’t wait to start it back up when COVID settles)
Considering my wife is currently fighting with breast cancer (and seems to be winning, luckily), I cannot thank you enough for doing this. It is an awful, life changing disease.

As far as I am concerned, you've won this thread.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Chips » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 13:44

greypanther wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 20:44
On a personal level that is. From talking to people out here in the real world, it normally seems to revolve around money and property, sort of a way of keeping score. This seems to be a very shallow measure to my mind, family; children; societal contribution and education/intelligence are far better measures. :)

What do you guys think then? How many of you think you are successful and why? ( I cannot say how hard it was to resist a poll herein... :roll: )
Success being defined seems to hang upon circumstances and measures... and therein lies the potential for depression and being upset (failure?). I'd assume most use it as motivation to strive for something, and it'll evolve as life progresses as otherwise you'd probably feel a bit arbitrary after hitting your goal.

Obviously I prefer not to remotely think of success as a life measure :D

Always seems weird when people say "money" - I think it's just a superficial response without any reasoning behind it. If I won the lottery next weekend, I wouldn't suddenly have become successful - though life would transition where I'd have a different set of things I'd like to experience/achieve. Which is kinda what success is (achievement). But a fixed representation is a bit wrong.

You could challenge nearly any definition of success -- waking up with worry/resentment means you aren't successful? So bad news means you're unsuccessful in life until you turn that frown upside down? Likewise the old cliche of "laying on my death bed and not wishing I had done something different" - surely at that point it's just being content with what you did (as there's always something I could wish I did... like be the first person on Mars. Also, the first person back from Mars (alive) :D :D



Success is being able to wake up without an alarm clock and having a glass of champagne with breakfast. Or is that alcoholism. Hard to tell :) :) :)

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Teladi CEO » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 14:29

Mailo wrote:
Sun, 14. Mar 21, 10:51
Teladi CEO wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 21:16
I haven’t achieved my success yet, but I am on my way. My goals are very high, and I have done measures to reach them. I run a charity ($20,000 for Breast cancer patients! Can’t wait to start it back up when COVID settles)
Considering my wife is currently fighting with breast cancer (and seems to be winning, luckily), I cannot thank you enough for doing this. It is an awful, life changing disease.

As far as I am concerned, you've won this thread.
I hope you and your wife are doing great, no one should have to experience either the effects of Breast Cancer on a loved one, or on themselves. My greatest wishes for your wife during this time, I am happy to hear she is doing better.
We don’t know what paradise is like, but probably it’s blue magenta, flecked with pink. But even if it’s green and red-checked we should make the most of it. -Boron saying

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by greypanther » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 15:32

Well, I would say Alan has it mostly right, but have to add that Observe is even more basically right: Food and a roof over your head is very important and the best of foundations. Many here in the supposed first world take such very much for granted. :)

@clakclak: Yes, I am glad I avoided the dark temptation of a poll, not sure it counts as a success though, just deferring the inevitable. :D As for your date tomorrow: The best of luck, though I doubt you will need luck, as you seem like a thoroughly decent person. :) ( God, I now feel older than ever. How long since I experienced such self doubt in such matters... :wink: )
Chips wrote:
Sun, 14. Mar 21, 13:44
Success is being able to wake up without an alarm clock and having a glass of champagne with breakfast. Or is that alcoholism. Hard to tell :) :) :)
I suggest Chips, that if it is becoming difficult to tell, that you give it a miss for a few mornings, just to see which it is. :P :wink: :D
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Rug » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 23:12

Success for me at the moment would be finding a way to get my tiny little python script to convert to an exe...

I've tried pyinstaller and cx_Freeze, but they just throw errors at me that I can't fathom even with Google's help.

So, not a good definition, but a very specific one at least...

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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Vertigo 7 » Sun, 14. Mar 21, 23:19

It's whatever you want it to be.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by fiksal » Wed, 17. Mar 21, 22:36

greypanther wrote:
Sat, 13. Mar 21, 20:44
On a personal level that is. From talking to people out here in the real world, it normally seems to revolve around money and property, sort of a way of keeping score. This seems to be a very shallow measure to my mind, family; children; societal contribution and education/intelligence are far better measures. :)

What do you guys think then? How many of you think you are successful and why? ( I cannot say how hard it was to resist a poll herein... :roll: )
I think the best way to go about is to make one up for yourself. This way you know the parameters and you hopefully know how to approach it. You are not dependent on others.

Money is indeed a default level of success that a lot of people use. While it can be for some, it also can be contradictory to all the other goals.

EDIT: realizing I didnt answer anything...

To me success is supporting ones family and self realization. Very generic perhaps.

I think I am moderately successful, yet there's always room for improvement.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by mrbadger » Fri, 26. Mar 21, 14:39

Success can be lots of things, not just one, even for a single person.

Having some students enjoy my modules is a success.
Writing, or rather re-writing a decent part of whatever book I'm writing is a success.
But also walking ten feet using only my crutch without having to lean on anything for support is a success, even if it always hurts.

It's an ever moving target. I'd hate to be a situation where success had only one meaning, like wealth, or fame.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by Mightysword » Wed, 31. Mar 21, 23:04

As I grow older I start to think a little bit differently. Many years ago I said something like this on this forum "my goal is to work like a dog in the first half of my life in order to live like a king in the latter half". Now ... I kinda struggle to quantify both phrase of that statement. The first decade and a half I was at the US I definitely felt I worked like a dog, I don't think I have been working like a dog in the last few years. But I also have trouble imagining what living like a king look like, because my standard for luxury is kinda low I think. :gruebel:

In the last couple years I started questioning the idea behind "having a goal" at all. A student with a goal of "just passing the class" may not put in a lot of effort and achieve a result lower than he should get. A student with a goal of "passing the class with an A" may create unnecessary pressure on himself, which in turn may compromise the result. I have been thinking ... maybe just focus on the short term afford and ... take whatever result that lead you to? So in this example, the student's only goal would be "I gonna do my best everyday". If your best is enough to get an A, great! If you best is only enough for you to pass, be content with that too. At the end the question isn't about "did you get an A" or "did you pass", but "have you done your best". In my experience, usually when I end up at a result I don't want, 9/10 times upon reflection it's really about me not doing my best.

I have tried to apply this line of thinking into a few things I do lately, and so far, I like it. I had tried to study Japanese a few times, each time with a goal I set to myself, and each time I faltered. This time, I decided not to set any goal at all. Things like "go through this volume in 3 months, knowing this many vocabulary, able to read this many kanji ...etc..." had all ended up overwhelmed and discouraged me in the past. Now, my only focus is the day to day discipline: 1.5h - > 2h a day, everyday. Where will that amount of afford take me ... will it be a success or failure, no clue because I'm not even bothering about defining such a thing this time. But what I can tell is I'm more happy about the progress I'm making now comparing to the time where I actually tried to work toward a specific milestone.
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Re: What constitutes success?

Post by clakclak » Thu, 1. Apr 21, 19:02

Mightysword wrote:
Wed, 31. Mar 21, 23:04
[A lot of interesting things, especially about a changing perspective.]
I do not know why, but somehow this comment spoke to me more than any other comment that was made before. Even though it is very different from my personal outlook on life. Thanks for sharing Mightysword. I appreciate your self reflection.
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