Joke...
Moderator: Moderators for English X Forum
Joke...
Doc - "Hello. How can I help you?"
Man - "I've got an orange willy doc."
Doc - "What??"
Man - "My willy - it's turned orange."
Doc - "Umm... I'll have to look that up.... It seems it could be a sign
of stress; do you suffer from stress?
Man - "Not really."
Doc - "What about stress at work?"
Man - "Well, I did have a nightmare job, a complete idiot for a boss, I
worked 80 hours week for pennies and then I got the sack."
Doc - "That sounds very stressful."
Man - "Yeah, but my new job is great - half the hours, 3 times the
salary and I feel really appreciated."
Doc - "Umm... what about your home life?"
Man - "Well, my girlfriend is a complete cow, she nags non-stop and
puts
me
down every chance she gets."
Doc - "That sounds stressful."
Man - "Yeah, but I'm leaving her and I've never been happier."
Doc - "Umm... what about your social life?"
Man - "Social life? I don't really have one."
Doc - "Really? What do you do in your spare time?"
Man - "Watch porn and eat Wotsits."
Man - "I've got an orange willy doc."
Doc - "What??"
Man - "My willy - it's turned orange."
Doc - "Umm... I'll have to look that up.... It seems it could be a sign
of stress; do you suffer from stress?
Man - "Not really."
Doc - "What about stress at work?"
Man - "Well, I did have a nightmare job, a complete idiot for a boss, I
worked 80 hours week for pennies and then I got the sack."
Doc - "That sounds very stressful."
Man - "Yeah, but my new job is great - half the hours, 3 times the
salary and I feel really appreciated."
Doc - "Umm... what about your home life?"
Man - "Well, my girlfriend is a complete cow, she nags non-stop and
puts
me
down every chance she gets."
Doc - "That sounds stressful."
Man - "Yeah, but I'm leaving her and I've never been happier."
Doc - "Umm... what about your social life?"
Man - "Social life? I don't really have one."
Doc - "Really? What do you do in your spare time?"
Man - "Watch porn and eat Wotsits."
_________________
Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm - Winston Churchill
chrishillproduction.com
Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm - Winston Churchill
chrishillproduction.com
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- Posts: 1451
- Joined: Fri, 25. Apr 03, 19:49
ok, try this one.Grox wrote:ya....sorry bud didnt amuse me too much. im not for the whole porn thing but thats another debate for another day.
Jim Morrison is in one corner of a hotel with the rest of his band. In another corner are John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr - and all are naked!
A beautiful woman walks in, drops to her knees in front of Jim Morrison and begins to play the pink oboe. Then starts on his guitarist, then his
drummer, and then the keyboard player.
When she is finished she wanders over to John Lennon and begins to do the same to him.
At that same moment, there's a huge crash and Michael Caine smashes through a wall in a Mini-Cooper. He jumps out, grabs her by the scruff of the neck and shouts...
.
.
.
.
"YOU STUPID WOMAN...YOU WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO BLOW THE BLOODY DOORS OFF...."
_________________
Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm - Winston Churchill
chrishillproduction.com
Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm - Winston Churchill
chrishillproduction.com
I quote from the "welcome" sticky:
2. Mild swearing is permitted (we are not saints either y'know). Minors do use these boards. Please bear that in mind.
Think this one steps over the line, sorry.
[EDIT] OK, put it down to me being annoyed at having worked 14 hours over the weekend, doing my back in in the process, and then finding the forum gradually dying on me...I'm unlocking this.
2. Mild swearing is permitted (we are not saints either y'know). Minors do use these boards. Please bear that in mind.
Think this one steps over the line, sorry.
[EDIT] OK, put it down to me being annoyed at having worked 14 hours over the weekend, doing my back in in the process, and then finding the forum gradually dying on me...I'm unlocking this.
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- EGOSOFT
- Posts: 13093
- Joined: Sat, 9. Nov 02, 11:45
that was one of the funnyest things ive heared in a long time
Come watch me on Twitch where I occasionally play several of the X games
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- Posts: 390
- Joined: Fri, 4. Apr 03, 20:39
hehe
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I WANT MY CHOC CHIP COOKIE!!
Having money only means you'll spend it!
I WANT MY CHOC CHIP COOKIE!!
Having money only means you'll spend it!