The Tale of Ea't s'Quid, a Truly Savage Split.

[Nathancros]

Yeah, it's actually harder the way I'm doing it now, because I don't have an M7M. Mostly it's a matter of getting the marines up to at least 3 stars, then putting them on the hull.

And learning to control the shielding. I'd say go find a Hydra to practice on. It's a huge target, so it's not hard to hit and then practice staying underneath it.

If you're hunting corvettes, my preferred tactic is to get in close either with another corvette, or an M3, and use that to control the shields, while the M7M sits a long way off. It's definitely not impossible.

alas right now im only attempting to capture a m7m, i cant stand spacewalking caps. my marines rarely ever manage to get to the hull. and even after im having problems.. last time i tried my marines didnt Die inside the ship. i just stopped getting reports bout how they were going after the 2nd deck... glitched it maybe?

anywayz ill stop spamming this awesome story of yours, dont stop writing mate and dont push urself to write cause i said that ahaha just have fun

[Triaxx2]

Oh, I always have fun.

Try burning off the missiles with IonD first. Or launch manually from the TP at right about a km, just in front of the target. It's perfect launch position and it should run right into them.

Sometimes Betty forgets to inform you of mission failure. Watch on the Property Screen.

[Nathancros]

Oh, I always have fun.

Try burning off the missiles with IonD first. Or launch manually from the TP at right about a km, just in front of the target. It's perfect launch position and it should run right into them.

Sometimes Betty forgets to inform you of mission failure. Watch on the Property Screen.

alas i prefer blitzkrieg style warfare/fighting. quick in, quick cap, quick out.

i need to reinstall Xtended, ive got way 2 many mods on my standard x3tc that its made it impossible to play properly. for instance i get soooo many ship bails that i usually have bout 20 ships in half an hour. most of them wityh 5-30% health. so not worth the capture but same time i cant resist!

but i cant go back to pure vanilla because of those mods.. catch 22 for me

[Olterin]

I won't chime in on the boarding thing, but I will chime in with: keep it up, Triaxx2, I'm certainly having fun reading it (love the "dead is drunk" approach, those silly deaths are ... well, nightmarish, most times ), so I hope you'll keep having fun writing it

[Triaxx2]

Might definitely consider turning down the bailing in your mod menu. 20 ships in that short a time is definitely a problem.

Thank you Olterin, and yes, it is a bloody nightmare trying to get anything done when I keep dying in silly ways.

[Starlight_Corporation]

Enjoyed reading the story, and as said before, the dead is drunk idea is fun Can get confusing if you die plenty in a short time, but some reading gets me quick on track.

[Triaxx2]

Yeah, I guess I gotta find a better way to separate story from humorously lethal drunkenness.

[--- is what I've been using. I'll try [===] instead. Hopefully that will work better.

[Triaxx2]

Chapter 6: Battles

Have you ever been on a ship just after it's been boarded? It's full of this odd, burned smell, and the stink of charred plastics. When a Split assault team boards a ship, it's a messy, nasty affair, even after the crew has bailed out, by simple fact that a pure Split assault team will feed off of one another and leave a pheremone smell that is intended to make the opposition's eyes water and lose accuracy.

Split in a mixed squad take a supressant to keep this effect down so it doesn't affect their allies. But a squad of all Split STINK. They are immune themselves by being part of the group. It's natural and automatic.

I am not a marine. While I have great respect for my marines, then and now, because I don't have the training and discipline to do it, I really do wish they'd keep their stink to themselves. So I spent the first week in a rebreather, designed specifically to filter out the smell. I shudder to remember it.

It's also full of holes. Admittedly, in this case, it's largely my own fault, since every marine is given a small flask of space fuel before the mission and as a celebration afterwards. Technically they get it even if they have to abort, just because they survived. But it means they're a little drunk when they get on board, and a lot drunk afterwards. But during the mission, it means they're tending to shoot at anything that MIGHT be an enemy, as opposed to what actually is. And true, they're kind of completely untrained in engineering, but that's beside the point.

From this point though, I have two realizations. First, is that I need a bloody jump drive. So with that in mind, I order the Eclipse in Rhonkar's Fire to acquire some 200mj shields from the local Medium sheild complexes. Sadly, they only have one a piece, but it's not a problem. Instead it's a good thing. Why? Because I've just crested a million credits. And that's a good milestone. That's the step necessary to move up to better targets.

Yes, I know what I need now is an M6. Good for you for figuring that out, but two little problems. One, I'm down to 3 veteran marines, and one classroom thickie. Not precisely a dream team there. And they're a man short of being a full squad anyway. That means that I've got to find two more marines and spend money on them, or find two good ones. There's a rumor of a Pirate Base over near Two Grand, but A) that's a bloody long way to go if it's not there, particularly in a slow TM, and B) it's an equally long way back, but C) both problems could be solved by the simple acquisition of a Jumpdrive.

Sadly, that's a hell of a lot easier said than done. There's only one thing to do. Keep on pirating.

So, unhooking from the dock, I engage and destroy two Boron Freight Transporters, and a High-Tech trader, on my way first to the EQD near the north gate, then further north to Rhonkar's Fire, and then Family Whi. Once I'm safely in Family Rhonkar, I'll jump out and fix the ship some. Welding panels back on is not my idea of a fun time, but I do indeed know how to do it. Even with it's speed maxed out, a damaged Zephyrus is no one's idea of a speed demon.

Passing through into Family Rhonkar, I find something I didn't expect. A Boron High-Tech Trader, flying south in a Medusa. After some 'Aggressive Negotiation', involving a PBE, I manage to convince the pilot to give it up. Wonder of wonders, he leaves, not only a 5, and 25mj shield, but also 3 Plasma Burst Generators. I really find it hard to believe my luck. So I don't, and shepherd the ship back, wait until it lands on board Battle Wagon. Once that is done, I shift the shields over, and now safely wrapped in 30mj of shields, I jump out and repair ship. With hull integrity back to one hundred, which is not same as full repair, I am ready for north to Rhonkar's Fire. 140 m/s is not fast, but it is better by far than 44m/s. And somewhat better than 88m/s. A message from a Split selling a Mamba catches my attention, and 500k credits later, I'm the owner of a third ship. This, and the Medusa shall be sold for profit.

Unless I can acquire a jump drive, it seems I'll have to fly escort for Battle Wagon on the way south to Family Pride, because it only holds four ships, and four ships I have to be transported.

“What's with the tenses?”

“What tenses?”

“You keep swapping between past and present tense.”

“Am telling from memory. Memory has many holes, like Mighty Split Warship. Have problem? Too bad.”

“I just asked. Sheesh.”

Anyhoo, continuing north, I picked up a patrol mission from the Trading Station. The Yaki won't be happy, but I really don't care too much. No ships out of it, but I get a Boron Military Supply Transporter with a cargo of Mass Driver Ammunition to bail, and leave 72 units intact. Excellent. If only I had some Mass Drivers...

But I know where I can get some. North in Rhonkar's Fire at the Military Outpost. They'll sell them to me, because I've been slowly murdering every single Boron I come across. Long and boring job, but someone has to do it. Busting up a Boron Energy Trader, I head northwards, aiming to reach Rhonkar's Fire. Suddenly I'm very tired, and I need a port to put into. But I have a plan, and I intend to see it done before I retire to sleep. Whether I succeed before I EXPIRE, I have no idea.

“Obviously you did.”

“I said from memory. This part from journal.”

“A journal eh?”

“Stop digging, journal not here! Journal in safe place. Safe from you.”

“Where?”

“Not tell – AIGHH!”

[---

Unfair woman. Now listen to rest of story. While I trek north from Family Rhonkar, Eclipse runs ragged around Rhonkar's Fire, buying up all available 200MJ shields. I need four. One for Eclipse, three for Zephyrus. If only have time to wait for more production. Oh well. Not my problem.

Undocking and heading through the East Gate into Rhonkar's is the best decision I've made all day. First I undock in Fangs, the name I finally decided on for my Mamba Vanguard, and head off after a Boron Barracuda Sentinel. Battle Wagon, my Zephyrus is ordered to follow. An OTAS High-Tech Trader escapes my notice, until it attacks Battle Wagon.

I turn around and engage the first of it's escorting Solano's. It dies quickly once I put PAC and HEPT into it. The other is more obliging and bails. Then I engage the TM itself. It bails. More than that, it does so with an intact jump drive. In short order, my Toucan arrives and the marines are aboard. After several tense moments... success. Jumpdrive, 3 200MJ shields, IRE's and 3 PRG. But more, a Trading System Extension. Which makes two, since the Solano also had one.

Transferring the Jumpdrive to Battle Wagon, and the three fighters aboard it to the Zephyrus, I jumped north to Mines of Fortune. Split say: He who leap, then look find trouble. In my case, what I found was a Boron Ray battlegroup. Spinning around and heading south through the gate pulls me out of it's sight. Of course, in the manner of all wise Split, I book it south as soon as I'm into Home of Opportunity. As bad luck would have it though, I'm heading straight into a Boron Heavy Hydra Battlegroup.

It's here I begin to suspect that my pirate actions have been noted. Though since I've only been operating in Split space, it's more privateering than piracy. But I manage to slip past, by putting fellow Split between me and the evil fish.

Only to be rammed from behind by the Heavy Hydra.

[---]

I hate those funny drinks. You know, the ones with stupid names. The ones made up by Teladi bartenders without a proper sense of humor. Lost Profits. Idiots gamble. Argon Folly.

Sitting on the floor, staring at the names of the drink on the menu, and failing to find a reason to get up and get away from my drunken dreams, two things become clear to me.

First, I need some more firepower. Okay, so I knew that already. But second, I need wingmen. Reliable wingmen. Intelligent ones. So what I need to do, is some trading so I can put my hands on some guns to outfit these ships. But the small area I'm in now is not suited at all to it. It's just too small. First I'm going to explore the pirate corridor leading to Paranid Prime. I need a route to the western Split sectors, and the only other option is to head south to the Paranid sectors there. But then I have a Boron sector to cross. And I'm unprepared. But going west to Paranid Prime means I can head south through the Teladi Sectors, and get to my fellows that way. Then I'll head to the south Paranid sectors and find a path to the south eastern sectors. There are only three, but one contains a shipyard.

Finally the hardest, the northeastern sectors. The dream says it would be dangerous to go now, so I'll wait on plans. If all else fails, I perhaps must take an M5, and trek the dangerous Argon Sectors.... I hope it's not needed, but I will prepare for the event in any case. First though, I think that I need to put a little more effort into procuring some armaments for the other fighters I've acquired. I mean, the Medusa and Mamba aren't too bad. Both of them mount PBE, and Spli produce PBE. The two best weapons for the Solano however are MD and PRG. We make MD, but no PRG. And sadly, MD require ammo. Which requires a continuous injection of funds. Trading only goes so fast, but the quick way to make money pirating is not in fighters, but in Freighters, and those are vulnerable to destruction by other enemy ships. And it's a long way from either Family Whi, or Haktikvah's Faith, to a shipyard. Admittedly, it's a bit shorter from Haktikvah's if I send them to the Teladi SY in Ceo's Doubt, but then I run a further risk of pirates. The other option is to park them up in Thuruks and convoy them up under my protection when I have say... 20 of them? I'd have to station some fighters up to defend them, perhaps using the second Zephyrus? Yes, I think that will work out just perfectly.

[Nathancros]

wait did u say ur lookin for wingmen? u takin signups?

[Zaitsev]

Yei, the story of Ea't continues *jumps with joy*

[Triaxx2]

Yes, I am taking sign-ups.

And yeah, it's still going, but for one, Ea't is a little more... violent to get started than my prior DID. Though I'm finding I really like the Dead is Drunk style. Not only does it fit Ea't as a warrior, but that it means I can have some of these thoroughly hilarious deaths and still continue to tell the story.

Now I just have to find something to board that's not friendly...

[Nathancros]

well in that case sign me in

if u can find it. use my wingnut char from your other story

also how much detail we plan to be going into???

full char or just a ship with a name?

[Triaxx2]

I like characters, but my story telling abilities as relates to them is not precisely up to par. I can try, but if you want to be more than a named ship, you'll need to have input on your characters.

[Nathancros]

kk then

Name: Wingnut

Argon or terran*whichever fits better for u*

Absolute Nuthead. completly crazy. is perfectly calm during some fights. absolutly boucing off the inner hull of his ship othertimes. absolutly INSANE..

tho give him a good enough pay. point him at the enemy.. and watch the feathers/scales/tentacles fly XD

ship name "What?"

if u need more give me a shout in pm or here

but if i leave it up to u to do wat u want when it comes to how much detail i will happily conform to the great Eat squid and triaxx!!

[Triaxx2]

Chapter 7: Exploration

I made the decision at this point, to take Battle Wagon down to Haktikvah's Faith. From there, I had two choices, west as I originally planned, or south into the Southern Paranid sectors. I flipped a coin, and swung south. It seemed an auspicious choice. But hidden windfalls are often found by trusting chance.

Naturally, as luck runs, I forget I should be hunting Argon, and not boron and almost immediately incur the wrath of the local Paranid Customs ships, by hitting a Boron weapons Dealer, rather than it's Argon Counterpart who escapes north. Heading towards the east gate, I find something very nasty, and do something very naughty. An Argon Military Heavy Centaur and it's escorts show up to try and kill me. Naturally being a Split Pirate, I take offense to their next move, which is all three of the Bombers flinging a single Tomahawk at me. Fortunately, I've got a bunch of Mosquitoes on board and three of them wing out to smash the incoming missiles. Launching Fangs from Battle Wagon, I send Battle Wagon through by remote then engage the tailing Gladiator. The barrage of HEPT and PAC is too much for it and the crew bails. The other two turn on me and open fire, but by the time they've come around for a firing solution, I'm clear through the gate and on into Third Redemption. I'll pick the Glad up on the way through back towards safety. If I'm truly lucky, it's got a jumpdrive, but for one I don't think I'm that lucky, and for two, I'm not counting on it. It'd be nice if it had some Tomahawks though.

A quick stop at the Paranid Equipment Dock nets me an Ore Collector, a Motion Analysis Relay System and Patrol Command software. Heading west, I see the efficacy of the MARS Goblins for my self. Through Perdition's End, and then south into Desecrated Skies. There I see a Paranid Nemesis trounce first a Duke's Freight Transporter, and then get trounced in the process of trying to take on a fully loaded Caravel. Oh well, I didn't want to capture it that badly. South into Priests Refuge it is.

Yes, yes, I could indeed have gone through the south gate of Moo-Kye's Revenge into Cardinals, but some little voice told me this was a better bet. Hard to say precisely why. Of course, if I knew, it wouldn't just be a feeling, but something definitive. Possibly the pointy end of a capital ship.

As I'm heading for the sanctuary of an SPP near the West gate of Priest Refuge, I have to jerk my ship sideways, and end up crossing the gate threshold. Why was I so close? Because I was being shot at by a passing Atreus Trader and it's escorts, and I was trying to avoid fire by closing with the gate structure. It worked well.

At least until I hit the threshold and found myself in Barren Shores. While the Zephyrus has many fine qualities, it does not in fact have a very tight turning radius. Finally I got it turned and slipped back through the gate, just as that stubborn Atreus trader appeared, seemingly intent on killing me as much as possible. Fortunately, it didn't follow me back to Priest Refuge. I hope the Priest doesn't mind that it's also My Refuge as well, at least for the moment. Finally docking at the SPP, I take a big, deep breath. On my way north, I am definitely going to have to stop and pick up a Docking Computer or two, one for Fangs, and one for Battle Wagon. At least.

Undocking from the SPP, I swung east, and shortly after, saw it was good that I had. Heading down from the north was a Boron Thresher. I suspect that was the source of the bad feeling about Cardinals Domain, since it certainly wasn't behind me in Third Redemption. So Good to Trust my feelings it is. Heading towards Cardinal's, I get tagged by an Argon High-Tech Trader, who launches escorts as if I did it. Buckethead.

Well, Buckethead without a ship. Using up a bunch of my missiles, and some judicious ramming, I cause it to bail. Now I just need to get my marines here from... where are they anyway? Oh, right, Rhonkar's Fire Military Outpost. And I have a grand total of 1 jumpdrive. Delightful.

Okay, so swap to Fangs, and then kick Battlewagon to an SPP up north in Family Rhonkar, then to the Military Outpost to transfer the jump drive to the Toucan. I hope this bird has a jump drive, or better, a Transporter Device. The Toucan arrives with my 4 available marines, and then it's all up to them. Fortunately, it's still got several 200MJ shields aboard, so it's relatively easy to control them, even with the reasonably meaty weapon configuration of 3 PAC, and one HEPT. The worst part is waiting for the marines to actually make hull contact. I must get an M7M soon.

I take the ship, but at the cost of three of my 4 marines. Nu t'Nnk has proven himself a more than capable warrior. As such, he will be sent back to the Rhonkar's Fire Military Outpost, and be transferred to my Toucan for further training. With that done, I've decided that the Magnetar is more valuable to me as scrap, considering it has a mere 39% of it's hull remaining. Selling a few other ships at the Family Pride shipyard, nets enough to both start his training in Engineering, as well as pick up a second marine. This one has 3 stars in engineering. He joins Nu in training. I'll pick up more, but for now, those two will be enough. Heading towards the Paranid Equipment Dock in Cardinal's Domain, I'm after a docking computer, since this is more convenient than stopping in Third Redemption. Arriving it turns out that I haven't enough Paranid Rep to purchase one, which is disappointing to say the least. Before I can leave though, I'm accosted by a Paranid. He's calling himself Wingnut, and insists he's Terran. I think he's bloody mad. On the other hand, it takes six of my ships security personnel, all firmly built ex-marines, to bring him to the ground.

He says he's a pilot, and that he can help. I'm not entirely sure if I should trust him, but I figure the worst that happens is that he doesn't do too well in his M5 and dies horribly. Best case he does a lot of damage, and I decide to bump him up. Possibly to that Medusa I snagged a while back. Since I only have one ship on me, that he's definitely not flying, I have him 'escorted' to the brig. I'll deal with him later. For now though, I take the Battle Wagon south to Friar's Retreat. There I find something nicely nasty. An Ares, defended only by a pair of M4's. I plot an intercept course, though I have no way to actually capture it, nor do I have the ability to get the hell then out of dodge after pissing off the authorities. It's compounded by two problems. One, it's more than just a pair of M4's defending it. Second it's very heavily armed. Third? It's bloody well being followed by a second Ares. This one is much less well armed, but is apparently piloted by a complete imbecile. It crashes into a Hercules as it's approaching the gate. The additional shields keep the Ares from going up, but don't prevent the Hercules from doing enough damage to cause it to bail.

This is perhaps the ultimate demonstration of piss-poor piloting. Ever. Of course, I still have no way to take it, nor do I have anyway to get it out of here. So for now, it will have to sit here and wait for my return. Instead, I continue east, heading for Patriarch's Conclusion. Rumor has it there's a Military Outpost in Contorted Dominion which is east of there. I suspect it would be a simple matter to pick up some more experienced Marines there. If so, it should bolster my ranks enough to take the ship. If not, well... What can I say? Perhaps I'll have to do it myself? For now I'm heading to Pontifex' Seclusion. From there, I'll see where I have to go. I suspect I'll find myself flying that Ares north manually. I do not suspect I will enjoy that. Ideally, a second jump drive would be a fantastic thing to have. It would mean I could bring just two ships. But for the moment I have places to be. There's a Paranid Military Outpost in Pontifex' Seclusion, so possibly a mixed group will be more useful than a straight Split Squad.

Picking on the Escorts of a Terracorp high-Tech trader nets me no goodies, but rank enough to get a Docking Computer. This is fortunate, since I end up smashing face first into a second Terracorp freighter, this one with a much better equipped fighter compliment, and several drones. I lose some hull integrity, and my Carrier Command Software. This is somewhat distressing. With Fangs out collecting cargo, I have to order it to defend me. I think I can definitely use 'Wingnut' and his 'talents' as a pilot.

And miracle of miracles, an opportunity presents itself. Entering Patriarch's Conclusion, I find a pilot offering a Scorpion Raider for sale. It's almost entirely intact, and frankly, since it was second hand, if it blows up and Wingnut dies, not much skin off my nose. If not well... I suppose I can think of something. Anyway, we dock at the local Equipment dock and I treat him to some speed and rudder upgrades. Along with a slap in the head and admonishment not to break my ship. Some fight software, and nav mk1 goes as standard equipment.

Meanwhile I replace my Carrier Command software. From there, we head to Contorted Dominion. I'd never been there before. With a Tiger in the background, highlighted against the nebula, it felt like a home coming. I was born after the destruction of Goto by Boron. Contorted Dominion is like pictures of Goto before the moon was broken up by Boron miners. It was beautiful.

Now, from the future I look back and understand the feeling again. That Tiger would later, much later, become mine. Indeed, checking logs now, I see Osan'gar is that Tiger. Perhaps that is why I feel so much at peace. I take two missions from the local military outpost. One from a Teladi, one from a Split. The Teladi gives me maps of the local Boron sectors. The Split wants a Scorpion. Retrieved from the local Boron sectors. Goody. Glad I bought the maps.

The actual retrieval is a bit of a doddle. The scorpion is in very poor shape, and so it takes a bit to dock, but when all is said and done, I succeed in more than enough time. Docking at the outpost, I decide I've had enough for one day. Wingnut is allowed to sleep in one of the state rooms, under lock and key for the moment and I retire.

---

Couldn't make Wingnut Terran or Argon, since they both hate my guts. Fortunately, I had an alternate plan. And yes, I did plan to put him in an M5, but if you've seen a Scorpion Raider, it's as fast as most M5's and as lightly shielded.

[Olterin]

A crew of nutjobs, is it? Very well, let's see... don't expect me to write up anything significant for this character - he's just a meatshield (and I'm not that good at writing Split )

Name: G'tt S'hht
Race: Split
Ocupation: Interceptor Pilot, currently unemployed, probably sitting in a Teladi bar somewhere being robbed of his last credits


___

Keep it up

[Triaxx2]

Hmm... Gut Shot huh? Optimistic.

I just take a normal character and exaggerate warrior aggression, and one other slightly odd characteristic.

But I can work with that. I hope he doesn't mind flying by the seat of his pants.

[Olterin]

[...]But I can work with that. I hope he doesn't mind flying by the seat of his pants.

Flying by the seat of his pants is his job - interceptor pilot

So no, he wouldn't mind that at all - and I'm well-aware that that may well get him killed very soon - I'll just come up with some other character then. Should he live, though, well ... we'll work on that if and when that happens

[Nathancros]

ahahahahahaah

tbh him being paranid*or watever u did* is more of a laugh. cause like I/we said. hes bloody crazy. he would call himself a boron humping split/teladi crossbreed. and say it without batting an eye. tho probably cacking himself laughing bout it 2 weeks later.. he's a bloody nutjob.

also if u want/need u CAN shorten the name to Nut. tho if ur all good with writing Wingnut then awesomesause

[Triaxx2]

Wingnut is fine. Considering I strapped him into a Scorpion Raider (296m/s, 5mj) I rather expect he won't live too long. Certainly not long enough to move up to something less hazardous to his health.